TOP 5 SMART ASS ANSWERS FOR 2004...according to Reader's Digest:

Submitted by Editor on Thu, 25/11/2004 - 00:07

TOP 5 SMART ASS ANSWERS FOR 2004...according to Reader's Digest:


----- Original Message -----
November 23, 2004
Top 5 Smart A** Answers

Smart Ass Answer #5:

A flight attendant was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket and he opened his trench coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat....she said, "Sir, I need to see your ticket not your stub."

Smart Ass Answer #4:

A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but she couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?" The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."

Smart Ass Answer #3:

The cop got out of his car and the kid who was stopped for speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day," the cop said. The kid replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I could." When the cop finally stopped laughing, he sent the kid on his way without a ticket.

Smart Ass Answer #2:

A truck driver was driving along on the freeway. A sign comes up that reads, "Low Bridge Ahead." Before he knows it,the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police car comes up. The cop gets out of his car and walks to the truck driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck, huh?" The truck driver says, "No, I was delivering this bridge and ran out of gas."

AND NOW........FOR .THE..

1 SMART ASS ANSWER OF THE YEAR 2004................

A college teacher reminds her class of tomorrow's final exam. "Now class, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness, or a death in your immediate family, but that's it , no other excuses whatsoever!" A smart ass guy in the back of the room raised his hand and asked, "What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class is reduced to laughter and snickering. When silence is restored, the teacher smiles knowingly at the student, shakes her head and sweetly says "Well, I guess you'd have to write the exam with your other hand."

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Oh my god!

Submitted by Anonymous on Wed, 18/04/2007 - 13:07.

What a bunch of morons. You people can't write, spell or make any sense.

what a smart ass!!!

Submitted by Anonymous on Tue, 06/03/2007 - 17:08.

at school my friend was sitting on a chair.the teacher said "r u more special than any one elce in da class." my mate says no.the teacher said "then why r u sitting on a chair." then my mate said ,"whys josh standing up."
lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

dan whitehead

Submitted by Anonymous on Thu, 14/12/2006 - 05:19.

(this is true) i was in weight training because im a javelin thrower and this girl was lifting 35 kg over her head,after that she put it down and she says"awwww god i felt that" i goes" well im not surprised you were holding it.

smart ass

Submitted by Anonymous on Sat, 20/05/2006 - 15:58.

sarah is the best
and that makes it a cool joke


Submitted by Anonymous on Sun, 18/03/2007 - 17:23.

NO sarah u aint the best u just think u are but i am hahahhahah and when u look in the mirror u will die of fright hahahah take the mask off!



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